Relationships From Prison

Nurturing My Marriage Through Prison

Nurturing relationships while struggling through the complications of a prison term requires a daily commitment. Carole and I understood the challenges we would have to overcome long before we agreed to marry in a prison visiting room. I wrote about our courtship and marriage in several previous articles. I meet many prisoners, however, whose wives […]

Our Sixth Anniversary in Prison

On June 24, 2009, Carole and I celebrated the sixth anniversary since we married under bright lights of the Fort Dix prison visiting room. The devotion and love she has given so consistently over all these years has been the greatest blessing of my life, and I thank God every day for the treasure of […]

Preparing for Happiness Through Adversity

The headline that crossed the news this morning revealed unemployment rates for March at 8.5 percent. That’s a number I watch closely, as it suggests the struggles I expect to face after I complete a quarter century in prison. If the unemployment rate is at 8.5 percent for all Americans, for those coming out of […]

Maintaining A Thriving Marriage From Prison

Since I am a long-term prisoner, many people wonder how it is that I enjoy such a magnificent marriage with my wife, Carole. I understand those curiosities. Divorce rates in America for couples who don’t struggle through the obstacles of confinement do not bode well for the concept of marriage. Carole and I are enjoying […]

My Wife Opposes Funding Prisons in Economic Stimulus

I feel very proud of my wife for the active efforts she makes to live as an integral part of my life. In late January of this year, Carole told me that she had contacted the offices of both California senators to express her outrage that Republicans were trying to squeeze a billion dollars into […]

A Prison Presentation For My Wife

For the first time since marrying Carole in a prison visiting room, on June 24, 2003, I was able to speak to an audience in which she was present. The occasion took place on Monday, 23 February 2009. Speaking and teaching has been an essential component of my adjustment over the past 21-plus years of […]

The Inspiration Behind Walt Jones’ Prison Adjustment

Kara wrote a comment in response to an article I wrote about my friend Walt Jones. She was inspired by the positive choices Walt had made as a long-term prisoner and hoped that her brother, who also was serving a lengthy prison term, could follow Walt’s example. Truthfully, the story I wrote about Walt did […]

My 7,861st Day In Prison

Monday, 16 February 2009 I left my cubicle at 3:05 this morning. The extraordinary visit I enjoyed with my wife yesterday took a lot of energy out of me, so I slept in a little longer than usual. The payment for those extra 30 minutes of sleep would mean that I had to sacrifice my […]

Celebrating Another Valentine’s Day in Prison

Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day. This year marks the seventh February 14th that Carole and I have celebrated together. I know that I’m blessed to have a loving wife who commits herself wholly to our marriage in spite of the long prison sentence that I serve. Others I’ve met in prison have asked how Carole and […]

Prison Policies Block Families from Nurturing Ties with Loved Ones in Prison

In the Second Chance Act of 2007, Congress found that although close family ties represent one of the most effective resources to help offenders in prison transition to society successfully upon release, prison administrators under utilize the resource of families. As a long-term prisoner, I know that Congress missed the point. Administrators not only fail […]

Preparing For Love Despite Imprisonment

On Sunday, 25 January 2009, The New York Times published an article by Matthew Parker in its Modern Love section. Mr. Parker was a graduate student at Columbia University and a man who had served 11 years in prison on an installment plan, a few years here followed by a few years there. He was […]

The Moment Prison Was Harder On Me Than On My Wife

On most occasions, I would say that imprisonment is harder on the family members who are not incarcerated. The prisoners grow used to life inside boundaries. The rules and rituals become part of life, no more annoying than a rainy day. I grew up in Seattle, so I’ve learned to thrive in spite of the […]

Maintaining Loving Relationships While in Prison

I recently received a question from a reader who wrote that her childhood sweetheart was serving a life sentence and he suddenly broke off their relationship. She worried that her sweetheart may be breaking off the relationship as a consequence of something going on inside the prison. As a long-term prisoner, I value my relationship […]

Love affair grows in a prison marriage based on love and commitment

Readers sometimes write me with questions about my marriage and my wife. They want to know how we keep our love alive and whether we anticipate challenges when we begin living together. Through books I’ve written, and articles available on, I’ve described my relationship with Carole, whom I’ve known since grade school. I am serving […]

Marriage in Prison

Frequently I receive letters from readers who’ve read my books about prison adjustments. One letter that I received today asked me questions about how I met my wife Carole, about how we married in a prison visiting room, and about how we have cultivated our love through all of the tribulations and turmoil that are […]